Unforgettable 6 Month War

In these frenzied first couple of days, I was horrendously aggressive to overhaul future potential calamity that I had anticipated such as "wastage of time". So I keep on attempting digging ideas and asking my self what's next, because I don't really want to give up that easy otherwise it will be meaningless. 

To me, these horrible spasmodic circumstances had brought me nowhere as it's like no direction at all. In that particular moment, I was feeling fearful to find a job because I wasn't ready to work at all. What's in my mind was still entirely college. 

The most torturing moment that I had ever faced was staying at home alone for many hours without the internet and feeling completely in an isolated island. Therefore, I eventually made a decision to rush to find a job without concerning what job am I going to do but as long I have something to accomplish. I called many friends regardless of those who failed or those who don't to get some information about job vacancies around the area. The job as a technician I enquirer a friend in Intel Corporation says I don't have diploma qualification and is not eligible. I asked some friends about sales job, and pleased him to inquire his employer whether is there any vacancies, he promised me but no answer too until today. It seems like nothing works for me at all. Finally, a friend who work in a restaurant came to my attention. I asked him everything about the job and without considering much, I've decided to work as a waiter in order to keep my self away from a devil's mind. The reason I didn't want to go out and find a job alone was because I was fearful and wasn't ready. I was thinking of having a friend to accompany me. I was very weak.

I remembered I've waited more than an hour for the arrival of the supervisor. It was 2.30 pm where the interview started. I lied whatever was necessary such as telling him I'm willing to work for years, and long hour and more in order to get the job. I didn't have a choice to choose to be honest nor to be fearful. I just know that I have to do something instead of dreaming in order to make things works for me. 

The interview last only a couple of minutes and I was asked to go home and wait for the call. However, the next morning despite waiting, worrying and did all I could, I didn't receive any call for the whole day. I keep on calling my friend who work there to ask the supervisor am I employed or not, but he was so confident and told me I will be employed and asked me not to be worried. Next day I waited again, while waiting alone at home, the house repairing and the annoying sound of drilling at the house of my neighbor for many hours almost drove me insane. I blew a gasket and thought of destroying the driller with a shotgun and force the guy to get out. Basically, this only happens in America, I was alert that I was imagining. 

Without wasting more time, I dash to the same restaurant again to confirm my status. If I'm not employ, I'll just go for another, I just don't want to wait like an idiot. This time a senior supervisor interviewed me again, I told her that I didn't received the call. After tracing the problem, we have found that actually the supervisor that interviewed me was a trainee and had forgotten to inform me at all. The contact number I left was found to be missing. I remained calm, and took that as a lesson. I had to accept that this is what you get, when you have nothing, people will play you around and taking your time for granted, never expect anyone will give a shit about you, you just have to start all over again and understand it. 

Finally, I was employed by the senior supervisor on the spot. My friend was right, there are vacancies in the restaurant. It's just that fucking asshole forgot to call me and misplaced my contact number.

The implosion of the pass dreadful situation has made tremendous upheaval in my "internal customer" otherwise known as attitude. When I faced unimaginable arduous moment along the painful journey, nothing was with me. At first I really mind forcefully, but after thinking thoroughly, I realized the seed of the problem. Maybe I failed to make people likes me, maybe I failed to practice the law of influence. Besides thinking so many maybe, I remembered a quote spoken by a businessman, "Friends come and go, when we need each other we become friends, when we don't we will leave and walk our own path, but when someday we realize we still need each other, we will become friends again, this world is all about using people, nothing is real." When I heard that, I agreed with what he said. I think we have to face the reality of this world. But I know there is a gap that separate the good and the great in terms of right thought. I choose to be great so this is what I think, "In the world of reality you see people using people, but I will choose to love my friends more although I know they are using me for instance. I will still love my friends more even they didn't bother me throughout my painful journey." You probably wonder why again. Well, everything that happens in front of us is merely created by ourself. It was a time tested experience by me and I felt happier. "A true man hates no one" - Napoleon Bonaparte. I knew my dream is colossal, and that's the philosophy that everyone have to master in order to get to the top. The principle is just merely irrefutable as it has been written thousand of years ago and was experienced by numerous military titans around the world. - to be continue...

(I was a waiter for about 3 month, the last day was 31 August 2008.)